This list will be updated constantly.
- “Yeah man I’d love to fix your printer”
- “Dude check out this user working at 10pm - I wish everyone was like this person”
- “It’s Monday? Let’s back up this production server right now”
- “It’s Friday? Let’s back up this production server right now”
- “I’m so glad I took that Philosophy class in sophomore year, it totally made me a well-adjusted individual like I am today”
- “SharePoint’s down? It’s fine, management won’t bother us about it”
- “Don’t worry, I’m totally not mad at you clicking on a phishing link from what seems to be an IRS agent using broken English and the email phantomdrake226@hotmail.com”
- “I’ll update that Barracuda filter as soon as possible”
- “Let’s set aside 1 hour to grab some lunch. Nothing’s gonna happen”
- “It’s so nice of you to give me 1-day notice for that new hire onboarding”
- “Yeah my PowerShell script runs on the first try with no errors”
- “No I never pirate software on my personal computer, I have a conscience after all”
- “Fluke? Isn’t that like... a type of fish?”
- “No I don’t have a multitool on me”
- “Of course I won’t automate my JIRA responses, replies should come from the heart right?”
- “I’ve never heard of hackernews before”
- “Why would I open Reddit first thing in the morning?”
- “Working Sundays is my J A M, put me in coach”
- “I’m so gonna upgrade this ESXi host on the first try”
- “What’s a snapshot?”